MFing Breakfast
by J4yd3n
Summary: Gamzee can't actually make Breakfast himself so Karkat has to do it for him. What started out as making the Juggalo an omelet sandwich turns into... something else. PURE FLUFF! Teen for bad language.


Disclaimer for Homestuck is owned by the all- powerful Andrew Hussie.

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Gamzee stated blankly at the cereal bowl with half-lidded eyes. The troll, of course was his usual motherfucking high self, his signature Joker styled make up donned his face. His Capricorn T-shirt (creased from having slept in it ) and polka dot pajama pants completed his look. With his appearance applied and set for the troll had just one thing left to do- make breakfast. Unfortunately when Karkat had gone grocery shopping he had failed to remember to buy waffles the only thing Gamzee knew how to make and now he was left to stare at a plastic green bowl. Utterly confused the clown journeyed to Karkat's room. He gave a quick knock but did not wait for a reply as he strolled on in.

"Karkat..."

Gamzee lightly shook his friend, earning a groan but Karkat still hadn't awoken. so he tried again "Best friend... best friend? It's time for motherfuckin' breakfast..." Karkat cursed and rolled onto his back. "What the fuck, Gamzee? Get your own breakfast!" The clown's usual smile disappeared. "But Karkat... i don't know how to make the motherfucking Fruit Loops."

Karkat slapped his forehead and explained. "The milk is in the fridge and the cereal is in the cupboard, idiot." He sighed before closing his eyes for some shut-eye. "Go do it yourself." He grumbled. Gamzee nodded seriously and said "Okay Karkat." ,before returning to the kitchen. Two seconds later a loud crash awoke the Cancer from his slumber. Grumbling Karkat rolled out of bed a stalked off to discover the origin of the noise. He wasn't exactly surprised to discover Gamzee drenched in milk and cereal stuck in his ebony hair and on the floor. "Karbro... i think something is wrong. The mother fucking cereal isn't ready." Karkat wanted to scream, that glass vase on the counter was begging to be broken. Instead he licked his chapped lips and grabbed a washcloth and i began to wash the milk from Gamzees face, careful not to smudge the face paint knowing how sensitive the older troll was about it without said makeup he felt exposed and kind of uncomfortable. "I'm sorry Karkat. i made a big motherfucking mess." a ping of sympathy shot through Karkat. He knew that Gamzee was only trying his best. Looking back up into violet tinted eyes Karkat blushed.

Why did he have to be so gogdamn short? Careful not to say it out loud with Gamzee's religious clown cult and whatnot. Gamzee was about 6 feet and probably taller because he slouched. While Karkat was 5 feet and had to tilt his head just to look him in the eyes. "It's alright. I shouldn't have trusted you to make it." Gamzee, being the loveable drug addict he was just smiled through it. "Thanks for being so chill about it." A miniature smile graced the redblood's lips. ( a rare moment , indeed) there was something oddly charming about his southern mannerisms and slight slur. "I got the cereal all up in my hair Karkat."

Though he wouldn't admit it Karkat was sure he just about coughed up his heart at that comment. Honestly Gamzee could be such a child sometimes, always asuming people's permission seeing as is father never let him do anything but drugs and drink Faygo.

" Karkat can you make me breakfast? cause I-"

"Yeah, yeah just- you know what? I'll just make you an omelet sandwich, how about that? " Gamzee nodded an turned on his heel to fetch some Strawberry Faygo from the fridge.

_Gog ..._ Karkat decided had best put proper clothes on being only in his boxers and T-shirt. When Karkat returned Gamzee was sipping on the 'mIrAcLe eLiXcEr' with a smile that rivaled his face paint. "Hey motherfucker." He greeted. Well it seemed he was more awake now. "Do you need some fuckin' help?" Karkat whirled around to face his 'best friend'. "No!" His tone was a little too harsh but after a few deep breaths he calmed down. "Just go watch TV or something, will you?"

Gamzee responded by bounding to the couch, nearly tripping in the process. He grabbed the remote and scrolled down until he found the cartoons. Ahhh Dexter's Laboratory- a childhood favorite. As karkat began preparing breakfast he looked back over his shoulder and smiled. Karkat knew this wasn't the true Gamzee but apart of him hoped that deep down that he wasn't crazy and really was as he appeared when sober. Flipping an omelet onto a piece of bread, Karkat sighed. "Gamzee! Your fucking omelet is done!"

Gamzee flew from the couch and slid across the tiles in his bare feet. The clown took the sandwich a sunk his fangs in. "Motherfucking miracle. Thanks best friend."

Gamzee lean forward, kissing Karkat on the temple. A deep blush dusted Karkat's cheeks. At first Karkat just stood in place out of shock, unsure of how to react , his usual angry expression softened, turned his head to face Gamzee he got another kiss- this time on the tip of his slate gray nose. As if Karkat wasn't confused enough. What the Juggalo doing , some sort of religious shit? What did he hope to accomplish by just randomly up and kissing him? They weren't even matesprites!

Taking this opportunity Gamzee mated his lips with Karkat's, a low purr escaping his throat. It was short, simple and sweet. They parted slowly, Karkat's crimson eyes fluttered open. Odd he didn't remember closing them.

"G-Gamzee do you-"

"Um bro your omelet's burning." Turning around Karkat discovered sure as hell was .

"Crap!" after ridding the kitchen of smoke and a ruined breakfast Gamzee turned to him. Holding out his sandwich he spoke.

"Here Karkat you can have my motherfucking miracle breakfast."

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Now comment and review or Sassy Gay Eridan will find you a have a scarf battle with you!


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